Rage Rage Rage Against… The Click?


It’s 2010, which to me seems like a date far far in the future. The world that I grew up in has changed radically, and I can’t pretend I didn’t see it coming.

– Chevy isn’t Chevy. It’s Chevrolet. No, it’s Chevy. And none of us really care, do we?
– BP (and every other major oil company in the world) seems to have pretended that an offshore oil leak was impossible, and made absolutely no plans to fix one. Clueless? Yep.
– And if there’s one constant in our lives, it’s Constant Contact. You and I are bombarded with these canned missives from friends, businesses, non-profits, radio stations, and President Obama.

Which brings me to my week.

As you may know, I’ve got two new story/comedy/spoken words albums being released this year: “A Holiday Present!” and “It Was A Dark and Stormy Night…” My record company and I are hoping that they do the iTunes equivalent of going platinum… but how? And then what?

According to some internet wonk, every “fan” is worth $150. I’m not sure I buy it, but maybe all those new fans will be big spenders… Maybe I’ll get picked up by LiveNation and end up on Dancing with the Stars. (Or maybe a new reality show, “Lying with the Politicians!”)

Anyway, we’ve been looking at how to keep in touch with the millions (fingers crossed) of new fans to come. So, I spent five business days evaluating different email distribution platforms. Constant Contact, Awebber, iContact, Mailchimp, ezinedirector, jangomail…  Why? So that I can count clicks and clickthrus, so that I can track who opens my emails and who ignores them. So I can set “campaigns” and create new marketing strategies…

Truth is I hate ’em all. Can’t stand them. Too much time required to set them up, too much information given to an anonymous company, and paying for email rubs against my grain.

And the more time I spend on that, the less time I actually spend on writing and telling stories — which is my job.

My conclusion — after much time and internal agony — Keep things the same!
Yes, it is possible, even in the post-post-post-post modern era to maintain the status quo — and save money doing it.

Welcome to the new BarkMinder, same as the old BarkMinder…
In the future, we’ll try to keep the upbeat stories high, the rants to a low, and provide what we used to call, “good stories,” but have now Chevroletized to call, “High Quality Content.”

As always, it will be random, haphazard, and I hope fun for you and your family.

That said, I’ve started to upgrade my electronic distribution methodology, and I thought I’d give you the details.
Tell your friends, join fan pages…

By the way…
Here’s a SUPER Secret…
Next week, I’m told that I’ll be giving away free copies of one of my albums to all my fan club members.
So have folks sign up

Enjoy the day.
– Mark

The electronic distribution segment!

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